Have you read about Hollywood actors who divorce after a year of marriage from "miscommunication"? Or "incompatibility"? Perhaps you think it's a way to showcase your freedom to give up someone as easily as you got. No more, no longer communicate, goodbye!Most couples break up because of lack of communication in different contexts. Lack of communication when you know things out details that you need, for example. Maybe you need more personal space for some solitude. And your spouse is like the brand letter attached. And you are reproaching you like to go alone in the mountains, fishing, football. Or he has abandonment syndrome because his wife wants to go out for coffee with amicele in the city or a movie with her sister. If you're the one who wants to breathe less alone and not to sit all day with your partner as a couple of Siamese that could not be separated after birth, then you must learn to communicate. To say calmly but firmly that you need moments of solitude, of space, frequent breaks. That's review of the more enjoyable the more you do miss it. Beautiful mind if nothing else.Or maybe you could not ask for help. The children used to call you when they need you something. Because mom or dad, the other parent, are a kind of kitchen furniture, not too responsive to their needs. That children, unlike adults, know how to vocalize. And then you, the parent who stays with them and feels exceeded all their needs, get to thinking bitter, full of resentment and anger at the husband (or wife, why not) who prefer to work weekends only not be present / D in the family, where it takes him or her. Because to say on the right, the family can often be stressful. And so you get to break at some point, if you shake hands, because it does not communicate. Perhaps you once you scream that you can not, but this message was not heard. Your loved one indifferent and said that it'll pass, it's just the usual hysteria yours. But that's not communication. A howl is not communication.
Communication means to stay calm at the table with the "enemy" and discuss openly without raising your voice. If you think it can not hear you, repeat. But all measured voice. It means listening to what the other has to say without interrupting him. It means you want to keep that relationship, to fight for it. It means to say openly, without fear and without reproach, you have to say. Especially without fear. Without fear of being judged, minimized ("Come on, darling, that dramatize ...") without fear of being ignored ( "What? Have you got something to say here? Gee ..."). It is to be respected and respect.
It applies to the relationship with the wife and the children and the boss. If you feel that things are not going so maybe I should, after careful consideration and a long period of communication style, to change the wife and boss. Children keep them. It educates.
0 comentarii